I’ve lived in the northeast my whole life.  I was born and spent my early childhood in Manhattan, moved to southwestern Connecticut for my adolescence, and migrated to the heart of Boston for four years of college.  The proximity, accessibility, and immediacy of the northeast was comforting to me and is something I think I took for granted - although I haven’t realized that until now.  Sometimes you have to uproot and relocate your life in order to gain perspective on the place you felt most at home.  

Although I only lived in Boston for four years, there is so much of the city that I appreciate even more now that I’ve left.  In a way, it’s bittersweet to think that I have a newfound and richer admiration for the city I spent four years in.  It feels bittersweet because I feel nostalgic for what I had but recognize that I no longer live there and need to move forward while still appreciating and treasuring the city nonetheless.  Although my living situation in rural Arkansas is not permanent, the commitment is still substantial and because of that, I feel like I am teetering on this fine line of being a settled resident and a passerby.

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Celebrate your home with theUncommonGreen 'State Slate' Board from Nordstrom

The reason I’m sharing my lessons learned from relocating my life is because I’ve realized what home means and feels like to me.  Perhaps you’re thinking about relocating for a job and starting a new life in a completely new place.  Do it.  If you’re young and not tied down by anything - take a chance, go out on a limb, and repurpose your life.  When doing so, remember that it doesn’t have to be permanent - but still soak it all in, immerse yourself, and be grateful for the adventure regardless of its duration.  I’m not saying uprooting your life and jumping into an unfamiliar environment is easy, but from my personal experience I can tell you it’s worth it.  Even in the moments where I feel uncomfortable, uncertain, and homesick, I’m grateful to have experienced this mobility and the opportunity to be exposed to a whole new way of living.

Even when I feel uncomfortable, uncertain, and homesick, I’m grateful to be exposed to a new way of living.

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I’ve learned so much about myself, what makes me genuinely happy, my values, and how I view my future because of the experience of living in an unfamiliar and new place. Something I’ve learned about myself in my time spent away from the northeast is how I view and value the idea of home.  Because I lived in three different states while growing up, I regarded each environment as my home.  In fact, while living in Arkansas when someone asks me where I’m from my reply is 'New York, Connecticut, and Boston.'  Granted, this response is always met with confusion and questions but my retort is, 'I consider all three my home and have lived in each for quite some time.'  And this sentiment could not be more true.  

Although I have thoroughly enjoyed and have grown from my experience living in the rural south, I have realized that where I feel most at home is in the northeast.  And although I don’t live there right now, that's okay.  Yes, I miss how close the states are to one another (it certainly makes traveling easy).  Of course I miss the urban life I used to lead and I certainly miss being close to my family, but what I am most thankful for through this realization is that I have a place to call home.  I have a place I can go back to that fits like a glove.  I have an area of the country where I feel most at peace, comfortable, and fulfilled.  But it’s not my time to live there.  I know that may sound unusual...is there a 'right time' to live in a certain place?  My answer is yes.  Although I don’t know what life will throw at me or where I will move to after my public service commitment is complete, one thing is certain: the northeast is and will always be my home.  And I believe it is a privilege to be able to say that.  I am so appreciative to have an environment in my life that makes me feel that way.  But it’s not my time to live there.  One day it will be, but not right now.

From relocating my life, I have become more self-aware, self-assured, and at-peace with who I am and where I feel most at-home.

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Here’s why: I felt restless in my home and I knew I needed to leave it in order for it to feel whole and at-home again.  I was getting stir-crazy in Boston and after four years of college, I knew I needed a change of environment, culture, and lifestyle.  I almost felt imprisoned by the feeling of staying in Boston my whole life without ever experiencing another state, region of the country, and way of living.  After packing up my car and moving out of my Revere apartment this past May I remember looking back at the Boston skyline and thinking, 'Don’t miss me too much. I’ll be back before you know it.' and I still believe that holds true.  Now that’s not to say I view my job and life down in Arkansas as temporary or fleeting.  

I refuse to let this next year and a half in Arkansas fly by me without taking advantage of every opportunity and moment.  My job is tremendously rewarding, I’ve made meaningful community connections and have found my niche outside of school, and have bettered myself in so many ways while living here.  I feel genuinely happy, grateful, and fulfilled in so many ways.  And I can still feel all those things while also recognizing that this is not where I feel most at home.  At first, I felt guilty for acknowledging that the northeast was the place I’d end up living permanently.  I felt a strong sense of guilt because I didn’t want to take my current living situation and job for granted.  I didn’t want people to think that I’m just here for a job and nothing else.  I was nervous that if I admitted that despite uprooting my life and experiencing a different lifestyle the northeast will be my home no matter what, that people would view my presence and impact down here as short-lived and meaningless.  But that’s not the case.  I would actually argue that by me being true to myself about uprooting and relocating my life, I have become more self-aware, self-assured, and at-peace with who I am and where I feel most at-home.

If you are also feeling restless or eager to flee your nest, acknowledge those feelings and run with them.

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My advice to you if you are also feeling restless or eager to flee your nest, is to acknowledge those feelings and run with them.  Your 20s can be such an opportune time to explore new places, experience different lifestyles than your own, gain insight into various communities, and redefine and reaffirm where your home really is.  If you have the chance to relocate for a job, even if it’s just for a year or two, I would encourage you to take advantage of the change of scenery and unique life lessons you inevitably learn along the way.  Even though my transition from an urban environment to a rural one was tough at times, I am filled with gratitude knowing I have developed a unique perspective on a different part of our country and the people who live here.  These are life lessons and experiences I will treasure for years to come no matter where I move next.  And when I move back to the northeast I am confident that my rural experience will inform the work I do, diversify the stories I tell, and deepen the life I lead.  Life is too short to stay in one place for too long - so go out and grab an opportunity that allows you to replant your roots...and remember, you can always move back to the place where your roots were originally planted. 

Remember, you can always move back to the place where your roots were originally planted.

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Read more of Dylan’s blogs and online contributions by visiting her personal blog or follow her on Twitter at @DylanManderlink. 

 

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