I often think about my first day in a college classroom my freshman year. I vividly remember how strategic I was picking my seat in the back of the lecture hall, in the hopes of avoiding cheesey icebreakers and introductions. As we went around the room with the basic name, major, and ‘three interesting facts about yourself’ spiel, I watched each person reluctantly rise from their chair and give their responses, followed by a long and awkward pause as each individual tried to come up with three interesting things to say about themself. It was in that moment I thought about my calculated seat choice in the back of the room and realized how uncomfortable people are when asked to speak positively about themselves.
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Self-love is interesting. We're socialized to embrace ourselves, our strengths, weaknesses, quirks, and ‘imperfections,’ as those are what make each of us unique and beautiful. However, where we seem to stumble is when we have to vocalize what we love about ourselves, with a fear of being perceived as vain or conceited by those around us. From there, we begin to develop an identity in which our self-love is confined and masked by this sort of diffident exterior.
We are in need of a shift.
We need to shift our perception to view self-love as something that should be celebrated both internally and externally, equally. That shift starts with each and every one of us. We need to remind ourselves that it's okay to embrace ourselves, and do so publicly.
So wear that crop top.
Leave short love letters to yourself on your bathroom mirror. Stand proud and be loud in those cheesy first-day-of-class introductions, because I know there’s way more to you than your favorite food and the number of pets you have.
The more comfortable we are publicly loving ourselves, the easier it will be to love publicly and embrace one another.
The way I see it, love starts from within, but it isn't meant to stay there. The more comfortable we are publicly loving ourselves, the easier it will be to love publicly and embrace one another.
Nuri Matthew is recent graduate from the University of South Florida with a degree in sociology. She currently resides in New York City as she explores her passion for writing working as an editorial intern with bSmart Guide.
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