There’s a stigma we face when we travel alone.  Sometimes that stigma is reinforced externally: when we answer ‘table for one’ or ‘just me’ to the kind-eyed hostess at a restaurant; by the front desk clerk who asks how many keys you’ll be needing for your hotel room (*smile* ‘just the one, thanks’); by the two guest minimum required for booking a Tuscan wine tour out of high season.  But many times, that stigma is self-inflicted, and based on irrational fears related to how we think we appear to others.  Meanwhile, this perception is often far from an outsider’s reality, primarily because insecurities ring loudest in our own heads.  The merits rewarded by satisfying our innate desire to travel, far outweighs the sense of security we feel by relenting to our fears.  Truth be told, we’re never venturing alone.  On the other side of that plane ride awaits the perfect companion for your adventures: the future you…

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The you who travels for the very best reason: yourself.

Of all the feats you perform solo, traveling takes you away from what’s familiar and breaks your mind free from the shackles that daily routine ensues.  A cracked open mind allows fresh ideas to flow, and when you travel solo, you don’t experience any resistance from a companion’s conventional perspective.  There’s no purer way to experience a new culture than complete submersion, and there’s no greater reason than to find this out for yourself.

The you who’s vulnerable and open to new connections.

When you meet and mingle with the locals, you’re able to see the city as a dweller, and not just a tourist.  A prime example: you pull out that trusty map, and – ugh! – the pub your friend recommended when she studied abroad has since closed down, you think, now what? Well, as a solo traveler, you have two choices.  You can either search for Wi-Fi and text her for another nostalgic (read: outdated) recommendation, or you could ask the seemingly-harmless, definitely-handsome, and previously-overlooked stranger near you for a back-up plan.  Not only are you leveraging a local resource, but you’re also opening yourself up to creating a new connection.  Perhaps said handsome stranger not only introduces you to the newest hotspot in Prague, but he also plays in a band that has a gig the next night in Budapest. ‘Are you free to join us?’ he asks.  As a solo traveler, you do have the freedom of an open and fluid agenda… {hint: this is the part of the story where you reply, ‘why not?’}

Refusing to wait for anyone to start this journey isn’t selfish; it balances you.

The you who releases expectations.

Your mind can’t be blown away if you’ve already made it up.  Solo travel forces you to release your expectations and break tired stereotypes.  Sure, our arms prickle when we sense a situation that is unexpected and unknown.  But what appears as a dark, undesirable alley, often leads to the most charming, tucked away treasures you can find.  Finding curiosity in the mysterious sets an important precedent: let go of expecting travel to be perfect.  It isn’t designed to be perfect, and neither are you. You  kick-start an irreversible trend by traveling to places you know little of, or have never heard of; packing only the procured self-confidence that you have honed while navigating cities with your open heart as your compass.  

The you who doesn’t need anyone’s permission.

The stigma of requiring external validation, guidance, or a socially-accepted experiment (like a bucket list) to travel alone will divert you off-course.  As my wise solo-traveling friend once said, “I don’t travel to find myself; I was never lost.  And I don’t have ‘the answers.’  Honestly, I just have more questions.”  By traveling solo, you seek out the destinations of your own roadmap, often discovering that ‘the answers’ have been in one place all along – within yourself.  Refusing to wait for anyone to start this journey isn’t selfish; it balances you.  Traveling solo makes you a better travel partner for the future because you’ve developed your own travel style, destination preferences, and confident savviness.  A fine-tuned inner compass and a refined palate make for a companionable combination.

Your mind can’t be blown away if you’ve already made it up.

The you who has learned to love…you. 

Spending time with the you who navigates foreign metro systems, the you who trusts your instincts in uncertain territory, the you who learns to rely on the strength of who you are, culminate an exercise in self-discovery and self-love.  As these qualities grow, so shrinks the stigma of travelling alone and the voices that carry their reverberations.  In their place awaits the person who you know you’re capable of becoming.  She’s patiently waiting for you to gather your suitcases, and your courage.  Solo adventures don’t delay your passage; the next stop on your journey always has been, and always will be, waiting for when you arrive.

Through her love for travel, and an enchanted six months living in Edinburgh, Scotland, Amanda discovered her calling to story-tell.  In pursuit of her writing dreams, she chose to make a cozy corner of Manhattan home.  When she’s not running loops of Central Park, you can find her tucked away in a wine bar, working on her first novel.  You can follow her blog at www.amandawowk.com and on Twitter and Instagram @amandawow_k.