You’re in a big, bad mama-jama long distance relationship and, let’s be honest, it’s not ideal. The tangible portion of your relationship is scattered with visits to each other’s respective cities and while you so enjoy those weekend/holiday trips, it’s not quite the same thing as one hop, skip, and/or jump to your significant other's apartment. Wouldn’t it be nice to high five (maybe smooch - if you’re into that sort of thing) and make a quick meal together, Blue Apron style?

Long distance is difficult.

Wyatt and I originally moved to New York to kick-start our careers. We agreed we’d give NYC one year and both came to the conclusion NYC is not for us; not right now at least.  For us, being close to family was more important than the brainpower, opportunity, and creative beauty NYC provides.

I’m the first to root myself back in Charlotte, but a portion of myself will also grieve the big city a bit; there is (obviously) nothing like New York.

Now that I’m back in Charlotte and Wyatt is in NYC, I’ve highlighted a few strategies to help me while pursuing this long distance shenanigan. For me, the sacrifice is more than worth it.  When you find a good egg - lock it down ladies. Lock. It. Down.  Here are my 5 tips I think will keep us in check and in love:

1. Know when you’ll see each other next

We did a bit of research on long distance relationships when we found out I’d be moving. All modes of advice pointed towards one common tip: know when you’ll see each other next; always have the next visit planned. W and I have booked trips to and from our cities until mid July. The comfort of knowing when we’ll be hugging it out again does wonders. PTL for US Airways, man.

2. Write handwritten letters

Ah, the power of penmanship. Nothing beats it. Sounds tedious, crazy, and sometimes downright backward, but I’ve found that the time I take to write handwritten letters ends up surpassing my expectations for the letter I write. Taking the time to pull out a pen and scribe your thoughts down emphasizes the genuine care you have for the person receiving the letter. If you’re trying to go above and beyond, allow your letter to be the cherry on top of an oversized, well thought-out care package. Can you picture the smiles you’d be giving? Get to UPS stat. Just go.

3. Create dedicated timeslots for FaceTime

FaceTime crushes it. FT> a phone call. Very simple fact!

4. Understand schedules and embrace flexibility

Be prepared for things to get in the way of your time together and understand you both need to continuously stay flexible. In our situation, work hours may get in the way as we both understand we’ve got to crush our jobs and put solid amounts of time into the work we love.

5. Pursue common interests

Even though this means you’re doing your common interests apart, I might look forward to this portion of our long-distance most of all. If there is a certain book you’re interested in reading, set goals to finish chapters, then discuss them once read. It’s a more creative way to unpack learnings together, but I’m most excited this gives me more to look forward too in conversation, as well as gives me a real-time goal to meet and keep myself busy. Does not hurt that I’ll be using my brain for the better at the same time.

Good luck as you count the days, hours, and minutes if you too are in a long distance relationship!