You should know (contrary to what you might have been told) that there are preconceived ideas regarding your abilities and intelligence about you before you enter the workplace.  For example, it could be assumed that a man will be direct, able to lead a group project, comfortable addressing potential clients, “easier to work with because he is less emotional,” etc.  There are positive attributes people could assume about you because you’re a woman, as well. They could assume you’re insightful, compassionate, encouraging, detail-oriented, and generally good with colors and design as opposed to math and numbers.  If you are entering a female-dominated industry such as fashion, the stereotypes will be different – but nonetheless, assumptions will be made about you that might or might not be true simply because you are female. 

 

 
Photo by Willis Roberts
 

How do you identify the assumptions in your workplace? Notice the professional roles and responsibilities other women fulfill at your firm.  Are they always support staff and never managers? Are they treated as overly emotional or feared business leaders?  Once you identify how your company views women, you can assume they will view you in the same way.  Therefore, you will have to go the extra mile to be viewed differently and to redefine the abilities and talents you offer your company.

 

I’m not sure if it’s nature or nurture, but in general, it seems that women view success qualitatively – “Are the people in my life happy?” – versus men who view success quantitatively – “How much have I produced and how much money do I make?”  The qualitative approach to success is helpful for having a successful family and healthy relationships, but it is not successful for being a business woman.  There are only two possible reasons you are working 1) to produce something or 2) to make money.  Neither of these depends on the people around you being happy.  Happiness is not a goal that should be a part of your job process (of course, try be pleasant, especially if you’re an executive assistant), but someone else’s happiness in your job environment – such as a boss’s reaction to your work – has nothing to do with your ability to advance your career, produce a product, or make more money.  

 

I’ve written about this before, but it’s worth repeating - women use too many words to communicate in the workplace.  Women speak almost 3x as many words as men therefore it naturally makes it more difficult for men to understand women when they speak.  Try this – use as few words as possible when you speak and when you email.  If it takes you 10 sentences to express yourself, try consolidating to 10 words.  This will make you choose your words more carefully.  Try to slow your speech down.  Women also speak faster than men because our brains process several pieces of information at the same time whereas men think one thought at a time (the whole multi-tasking versus linear thinking argument).  You will notice that you will start speaking in simple versus complex sentences.  This is a good thing in business.  If you really want to go the extra mile, try to keep your pitch even at one level instead of letting your voice rise with excitement.  You might think I’m being sexist, but you will honestly be inaudible to men (like a Peanuts character talking to Charlie Brown).  Tip – if you’re in a fight with a male loved one, the whole “slowing down your speech, using fewer words and simple sentences” tactic works wonders for being heard.

 

Women generally approach task and decision making emotionally.  Try to remove your emotions from decision making and task execution, and work "from the head up."  Unlike the creative process (where emotions and instincts are critical), having emotions with business decisions and while executing tasks will exhaust you because there are so many decisions to make and so many tasks to execute.   This is one of the leading challenges for women in business because we naturally emotionally process everything.  With the huge volume of decisions to make and tasks to execute, you have to almost prevent yourself from feeling, make yourself a robot, and just execute.  That's why men are so good at business.

 

Second, many women like to wait until they're an expert before executing a task.   It can be wrong or messy, just start.   Presumably you are not an expert at…being a paralegal, being an administrative assistant, knowing how to publish a book, working in an ER, running a portfolio of stocks.  The majority of the battle with being “successful in business” is literally just doing it.  Every step of your career will lead to new territory  so you'll have to plunge in as an amateur and make decisions that are wrong or bad, but that's ok - you just have to make them and you can always  amend as you learn more.

 

To state the obvious, women have a biological cycle which physically affects their work performance.  For me, the first day I’m on my period, I’m so tired I could fall asleep at my desk.  The day before my period, I’m extremely sensitive such that I could cry or feel that “the world is falling apart.”  Recognizing these biological patterns and anticipating them will help you manage your performance at work and adjust accordingly so that you don’t impose your personal physical experience on others and their productivity.  

 

Finally, the subject of how to dress in the workplace has caused many awkward moments, be it with older female superiors commenting on the appropriateness of your choice or male co-workers commenting on the appropriateness of your choice.  It’s much easier for men to dress for the workplace: Tie, no tie, polo, khakis, black socks or grey socks.  For women, we want to look attractive, we want to look stylish, but we’re not supposed to be too sexy with our dress. The general rule of thumb I have is this: Be as fashion forward as you like if it’s within the company’s dress code (you can always ask for clarification), but don’t show the area of your thighs 2 inches above your knee (black tights can give you a little wiggle room) and don’t show the top of your breasts or cleavage (a jacket over a camisole helps to deal with the top of the breast issue).  It’s not that you aren’t beautiful, but men think about sex probably every 7 minutes in some way – Do you want to be a part of their sexual thought while you’re giving your presentation or asking for a raise?