It’s impossible to know a person after a few minutes or hours. It takes months or years and a lot of time together in a variety of circumstances, to really know a person.  Determining if you are with the right person is only possible after you have done a fair amount of information gathering.  It’s only after you have gathered this information – how your partner treats others, how he/she views himself/herself, how he/she treats money –  that you can know if this person is the right person for you. 

 

Photo by Willis Roberts

 

Many people think that after a significant amount of time together, they should commit to their partner.  The truth is that it’s only after a significant amount of time together in a variety of circumstances that you can know if your partner is someone to whom you should commit in a lasting relationship.  The challenge is to remain objective enough through a lengthy relationship to take the action to meet someone else if you gather information that your partner is not the right person for you.  Therefore, it’s prudent not to form bonds of intimacy that would be terribly painful should either of you determine you’re not with the right person.  

 

Tip: Date a lot, date often, and don’t become emotionally married until you have enough information to determine that this is the right person for you.